Hierarchical Japanese Society and Language Use: Politeness Levels in Practice

When one of my students first encounters keigo, the reaction is usually the same: "Is this a different language now?" It isn't — but it really feels that way. Japanese doesn't just convey information; every single sentence establishes the relationship between speaker and listener. Who ranks higher, who belongs to your group, how close you are to each other.

In this article, we'll go through the three main levels — casual, polite, honorific — examine the cultural logic behind them, and I'll show with practical examples when to use which, so you don't end up in an awkward situation.

Japanese society has been strongly hierarchical for centuries: Confucian thought, the class divisions of the samurai era, and modern corporate culture have all pushed in the same direction. The language has preserved this not as decoration, but as a functioning tool.

The system can't be understood without two concepts:

• Uchi (内) and soto (外): "inside" and "outside." Your own group — family, company, class — is uchi. Everyone else is soto. If you talk about your boss to an outside client, you don't elevate them with honorific language, because they're on your side.
• Jōge kankei (上下関係): the relationship between those above and below. Age, position, experience, buyer-seller relationship — these determine who ranks higher.

On top of this comes the senpai–kōhai system, which follows people from school to the workplace. Whoever joined a year earlier is senpai, and you use the language forms appropriate to them. This isn't subordination but an arrangement of roles — in Japanese logic, this is what makes cooperation predictable.

A keigo a leggyakoribb pont, ahol az önálló tanulás megreked, mert itt a visszajelzés nélkülözhetetlen. Ha munkahelyi helyzetekre készülsz, a vállalati japán nyelvórákon valós szituációkban — telefonos ügyintézés, e-mail, tárgyalás — gyakoroljuk az udvariassági szinteket.

This is the direct speech style based on the dictionary form of verbs. It's used within families, among close friends, between students of the same age, and in inner monologue. Many think this is the "easy" level, but it's actually very sensitive: used in the wrong situation, it's offensive.

• 行く — I go. (instead of 行きます)
• 食べた? — Did you eat? (instead of 食べましたか)
• そうだね。— Yeah, right.
• 行かない — I'm not going.
• これ、うまい！— This is delicious! (masculine, very direct)

Still, learning the casual level is essential for two reasons: first, this is always the form used in subordinate clauses (日本へ行くとき — when I go to Japan), and second, anime, films, song lyrics, and real communication between friends all happen at this level.

This is the world of です/ます, and it's the default safe mode for anyone currently learning Japanese. With strangers, in shops, with colleagues, with a teacher: this will never offend anyone.

• 行きます / 行きません / 行きました / 行きませんでした.
• 学生です。— I am a student.
• これはいくらですか。— How much is this?
• すみません、ちょっと分かりません。— Excuse me, I don't quite understand this.

This also includes bikago, "beautifying language": お茶, お金, ご飯 — the prefixes お and ご don't refer to a specific person but elevate the general refinement of speech. It's more common in formal speech and in feminine speech style.

Keigo (敬語) is an umbrella term covering two separate subsystems that learners love to mix up. The key point is simple: who is performing the action?

• Sonkeigo (尊敬語) — respectful language: you elevate the OTHER person's action. 先生が召し上がります。(The teacher eats.)
• Kenjōgo (謙譲語) — humble language: you lower YOUR OWN action. 私がいただきます。(I eat / I accept.)

A few basic verbs at all three levels:

• To eat: 食べる → 食べます → 召し上がる (sonkeigo) / いただく (kenjōgo).
• To go: 行く → 行きます → いらっしゃる / 参る.
• To say: 言う → 言います → おっしゃる / 申す.
• To look: 見る → 見ます → ご覧になる / 拝見する.
• To do: する → します → なさる / いたす.
• To be: いる → います → いらっしゃる / おる.

There are also general formation patterns you can use to make keigo from any verb: お + verb's i-stem + になる (sonkeigo, e.g. お書きになる) and お + verb's i-stem + する (kenjōgo, e.g. お持ちします). If you know these two patterns, you can handle most situations elegantly, even if you can't recall the special verb.

The "super-polite" forms heard in shops form a separate category: いらっしゃいませ, 少々お待ちください, かしこまりました, 恐れ入りますが. You don't need to use these actively, but you must be able to recognize them, since everyday transactions consist of them.

In Japanese workplace culture, using the right language register is part of professional competence. At a Japanese company, HR looks not only at how much you understand, but also whether you can speak correctly in front of a client. As an interpreter, I've often seen a technically accurate sentence delivered in the wrong register ruin the mood.

• Work emails, phone calls, negotiations: they don't work without keigo.
• It appears regularly on the JLPT from N3, and prominently at the N2–N1 level.
• Interview situations: correct humble language is often decisive here.
• Human relationships: switching levels signals growing closeness. When someone says 敬語はいらないよ, it's an invitation to friendship.

• Using sonkeigo for yourself: 私が召し上がります — this is truly embarrassing, meaning something like "I deign to eat."
• Using kenjōgo for the other person: 先生が申しました — this demeans your teacher.
• Elevating your own boss in front of an outside client: the correct form is 部長はおりません, not 部長はいらっしゃいません.
• Excessive keigo among friends: it comes across as distant and cold.
• Casual speech with a stranger — the most common beginner mistake, especially with expressions learned from anime.
• Using ～さん for yourself or your own family member in front of outsiders.
• Double keigo (nijū keigo): お召し上がりになられる — overdone to the point of being incorrect.

The same content at three levels, so you can feel the difference.

• "I'll come tomorrow." — 明日来る。/ 明日来ます。/ 明日参ります。
• "May I look?" — 見てもいい？/ 見てもいいですか。/ 拝見してもよろしいでしょうか。
• "Wait a moment." — ちょっと待って。/ 少し待ってください。/ 少々お待ちください。
• "What do you think about this?" — どう思う？/ どう思いますか。/ いかがお考えでしょうか。
• "I don't know." — 知らない。/ 知りません。/ 存じません。

What I recommend as a learner: build yourself three "personas." A friendly one, a polite one, and a business one. For every new expression, ask which persona it belongs to. In lessons we practice this with role-play — shopping, job interviews, business phone calls — because keigo works when the situation calls it up, not when you've memorized a table.

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